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A different photo of Charlie will appear here every time you visit the blog.
You can scroll to see the archives or use the menu in the sidebar.  Hi. Hi! I’m here, and you’re here, and I have something to share. And it’s about Charlie. Everything begins and ends with Charlie, and begins again… Ok. So, when I last left off here a few years ago, I was spinning. When Charlie left this realm, I became obsessed with spinning his wool as a way to feel close to him. But I was not about to spin his wool until I got really, really good at spinning. So I spun a ton of not-Charlie’s wool. I spun all sorts of different sheep’s wool, yak, silk, all sorts of fibers.  And by the time I felt accomplished as a spinner, I no longer felt the urgency to spin Charlie’s wool for my broken heart, or to try to heal my broken heart. I had moved through the acute period of grief at that point. And I didn’t know what I was meant to do with his fur. I didn’t know what project it was meant to be used in, I didn’t know how I was meant to honor Charlie in this way. So, I kept it in the freezer. And then, the reason came to me. The reason just came to me last week. And this is what I’m sharing with you. But to do so, I need to jump to the other side of my life, which is cows, and raising beef, and keeping them out of the system. A couple of years ago, I was invited to be part of something really incredible. There was a federal program called the Local Food Purchase Assistance grant. And this was specifically for food banks to buy food from local farmers and ranchers, to then give away. The program supported small producers and local economies across the country, and all the people who face food insecurity and are assisted by food banks. The Food Bank of Wyoming received this grant, and I was the first person they called to partner with. Through this grant, the Food Bank of Wyoming bought sixteen thousand pounds of Star Brand Beef. It was an incredible experience, one of the most fulfilling things I’ve been part of.  This program was cut by Trump last year and it no longer exists. Last year, food banks across the country lost over a billion dollars in federal funding. On an already small budget, it’s not like food banks had the military budget. And a billion of it is gone. There’s a bunch of stuff going on in my life that won’t fit in this post, but the short version is that delivering Star Brand Beef is just not possible this year. The cattle market is so high, the highest it’s been in decades, and I could take my steers to the sale barn and make as much as I did selling Star Brand Beef. But the thought of doing that destroys me. I’ve spent so much of my time and energy working towards keeping cattle out of the feedlot system. I wrote an entire book about this! I did not know what to do. And then Charlie came to me. And was like, ‘Hey, use my fur. It’s time to use my fur.’  I’m laughing and getting weepy as I type this. Questions? Feel free to email me. And I think I’ll be sharing more here again soon. It feels like it’s time.  
six years ago:
Flower Child   Hello out there!!! It’s been a while! A long long long long while. Last fall, I decided I wasn’t going to do a Charlie calendar this year….. which felt very weird but life simply did not have room for it. And then, in January, I checked my email for the first time in months and there were so many messages asking if there would be a calendar, and sharing what a consistently special part of people’s lives it has become, and I was like, how can I make this work???? And I found a way!! And so…… Back by popular demand, the 2025 Charlie calendar is here to wild up your walls. Since this calendar is debuting a month into the new year, it includes a full twelve months you can use: from February 2025 through January 2026. So you still get a full year of Charlie to enjoy. I’m not available to ship orders myself this year, so I’m having the calendar printed and shipped via Lulu. See the calendar and order it, if you so desire, right HERE. Wishing you a magical new year………..
five years ago:
A Spoonful Of Sugar For 18 months after Charlie’s death, my only desire was to grieve. I celebrate how deeply I let myself experience my grief and how completely I prioritized myself during this time. I took a sabbatical, and only did what I felt like doing. At first it was mostly crying in bed. After a couple of weeks of self-medicating with every substance I could get my hands on, I desperately wanted to feel close to Charlie again, physically close to him. So, I dusted off my grandmother’s spinning wheel, had new bobbins 3D printed to fit the vintage wheel, and taught myself to spin. My goal was to eventually spin the bags of Charlie’s wool I’d saved every year when he shed his winter underfur. I practiced with sheep’s wool. I spun for five or six hours a day, listening to the same three songs on repeat the entire time. In my remaining waking hours, I devoured spinning videos on youtube and read spinning forums. I still haven’t spun Charlie’s wool…. but now I know I can. And I have so much yarn! At some point, I started hiking daily with the dogs, often to the bottom of a secluded canyon where I’d spin on a spindle while sunbathing all day long. I created such a luxurious cocoon to be so sad within. So much good food that I made from scratch from the finest ingredients. So many baths. So many books. So much time spent outside in the wilderness. And then after 18 months, I realized I no longer desired my grief to be my priority or the defining feature of my life, and I didn’t want it to become a crutch. That’s when I shared my birthday self portrait on instagram. I wasn’t ready to write anything, but I knew that picture was worth a thousand words, that it would show that I was ok, that I was coming back into life again.  When I took that photo, I still didn’t know who I was without Charlie. I didn’t know what I wanted for my next season of life, and I didn’t fully want to know—thinking about it felt like the last big goodbye. Taking this picture felt like my first step into that abyss, the abyss of Next. And I do love a good abyss. It’s been 18 months since that first step, and what an abyss it has been. Love, magic, adventure. Returning to parts of myself placed on pause for Charlie, discovering parts of myself I hadn’t yet met. Stories for other days. In the meantime, I have Charlie’s 2024 calendar for you. He’s with me every day. CLICK HERE if you’d like to spend another year with him, too. And tell me a little about your last three years in the comments, if you please…. 
three years ago:
Light Of My Life  My web magician and I have set up some really cool code for The Daily Coyote. Starting tomorrow and forevermore, the top post of this site will feature a photo of Charlie from our vast archives, which will change with every visit the blog. I didn’t want the daily pictures to end, or for Charlie’s blog to become static. With this new feature, there will always be a surprise from Charlie when you visit The Daily Coyote. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do. I’ll be back to post more stories about Charlie and never-before-seen pictures from deep within the treasure chest of my hard drives, but such posts will be unscheduled and at random. Since my written posts are mixed in with pictures around here, I’ve put my last long written posts about Charlie HERE so they are easy to find.
one year ago:
Solid Gold  photo taken October 2020
one year ago:
Solid Gold |
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